sometimes you have to make decisions that don't make sense, because they are right.
i feel like i was raised well, to know that sometimes you have to make decisions that are not always easy, but they are right. one time, when I was 16 or 17, i planned a dance for the youth in my area. about the same time that i started planning for the dance, our next door neighbors asked if i would stay the night at their house, all evening, and watch their kids for their anniversary. of course i said yes. then, about a week before the dance was supposed to happen, i realized that i had done something horrible.
i double booked myself.
That meant that now, i had to make a choice. Because i didn't have much notice, there wasn't resources for me to find someone to take my place in babysitting, besides the fact that they had asked me to help. whereas, even though of course my first choice to go and manage and enjoy the dance i had spent so much time planning, there were people i had worked closely with that i knew would be able to manage it without me. I prayed, and thought, and counseled... and eventually concluded that in this case, right was not easy. I had spent months planning this dance. It was olympic themed, and i spent hours working with a council of youth and leaders planning what relays we would do, and delegating who would be in charge of what. learning what our budget was, and putting together teams, and games, and decorations, and supplies. I was so eager to go and have a good time, and watch all of my hard work come together in the joy on the faces of my peers.
but with some prodding from my parents, and the spirit, i knew that i had signed up for too many things. i was obligated to babysit for my neighbor since that was the first thing i had signed up for.
i cried over that decision. it might seem petty now, but to 16-year-old me, it was sort of a big deal. i was devastated to not be able to go to this dance. but i knew that i had to do what was right.
Heavenly Father knows what we need. sometimes he gives us decisions between right and wrong. more and more, i believe that he gives us decisions between good, better, and best. sometimes it is easy to settle with what is good. and sometimes even what is better. but we need to keep an eye on what is best. striving for what is best is what will take us so much farther.
and sometimes those decisions that we make are not easy. they are not what we want. we have to be able to see what we want, and set it aside, so that we can make an effective decision- the best decision. the one that will most benefit us, and all those around us that might be effected... and you have to consider your future as well, and any possible consequences and outcomes.
i have done a lot of pondering this last week. a lot of thinking, and a lot of praying. prayer is so important. to know the difference between right and wrong. or between better and best. or to know what will make you the most happy. or just simply to know which way to care more. prayer will lead you to an answer. sometimes that answer comes immediately, and sometimes it comes through a lot of sweat and tears. lots, and lots of tears. and more prayers and hard work, plowing forward until God says that you have finally learned what you needed to. then sometimes he says yes, or no. sometimes he says what you want to hear, and sometimes he gives the answer you didn't want, or didn't expect. sometimes he had you wait so that an alternate route could be opened up that you didn't even know was possible. sometimes he just expects us to walk forward, and trust. trust that even though things are hard, it will all work out. trust that He knows more.
trust that He is there to strengthen, and comfort, and answer.
trust that He will never let you fall too far.
He won't give you more than you can handle without Him by your side.
trust that when you go through hard times, there is a purpose. always.
trust that he loves you. He knows you.
He wants you to succeed.
trust that he trusts you.
And when we follow promptings that we receive, even when they don't makes sense, or they seem difficult, we will always be right. It doesn't mean that the path won't be hard, but it does mean that you are walking with your Father in Heaven by your side, and that He is proud of you. It does mean that you will be happier in the end, and that you can succeed and grow and learn and develop into the person that He has planned for you to become. Our trials are tailored specifically to us and our individual needs. There is no decision that we have to make that isn't necessary. no hurt that wasn't vital to our progress.
I am so grateful for a Father that I know cares for me. A Father that I know I can trust.
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